If you’re reading this, you’ve probably already questioned yourself if you have accidentally taken your neighbour’s bread or glass. Proper dining etiquette is important for making a favourable impression at business lunch or dinner, or even at more casual affairs, such as a date or family gathering.
The purpose of dining is to spend your time engaging with others, and not worrying about which fork to use. Although common sense is often the best guide, this post will answer the 5 most common dining etiquette questions to help you stand out! If you’re interested to learn more about dining etiquette, please check out my courses.
To dive deeper into the art of dining etiquette, explore our etiquette courses or schedule a one-on-one session for personalized guidance.
One of the most common dining etiquette concerns is using the wrong utensil. The general rule of thumb is to navigate your place setting from the outside inwards. This means you should use the utensils placed on the outside first and work your way inward with each course. Each course should have its own set of utensils. If the utensils are not laid out on the table initially, they will be brought to you with or just before the meal is served. If you accidentally use the wrong utensil, don’t panic. Simply ask the waiter for a replacement. This simple guideline ensures that you use the right utensils without feeling embarrassed or confused.
It’s easy to get confused about the placement of bread and drink glasses. Remember that your glasses are always on the right, above your knives, while your bread and butter plate are on the left. Here are two easy-to-remember tricks to help you out:
Think of the acronym “BMW” for Bread, Meal, and Water. This reminds you that your bread-and-butter plate is on the left, your meal is in the middle, and your water or wine glass is on the right.
Make “OK” signs with each hand. Your left hand forms the letter “b” for bread, and your right hand forms the letter “d” for drink. This trick helps you remember the correct placement of your bread and drinks.
These methods are simple yet effective ways to ensure you use the correct bread and drink glasses, avoiding any awkward mix-ups during your meal.
Napkin etiquette is another important aspect of dining. Upon seating, place your napkin on your lap. In high-end restaurants, the waiter may do this for you. If you’re attending a dinner with an official host, wait until they take their napkin first, and then follow suit. This gesture signals the start of the meal and shows respect for the dining occasion.
Removing unwanted items from your mouth, such as a fishbone, can be tricky. The general rule is that the way it went in is the way it should come out. If there’s a bone in your fish, use your fork to discreetly place it on the edge of your plate. Typically, the upper left part of your plate is designated for discards. Avoid spitting anything into your napkin, as this can be seen as impolite and unhygienic.
When faced with unfamiliar or challenging foods, it’s best to observe others. If you’re unsure which fork to use or how to eat a particular dish, watch your host or other guests and follow their lead. In a restaurant setting, don’t hesitate to ask the waiter for guidance. They are there to assist you and can provide valuable advice on how to properly enjoy your meal.
Tip
Whether you’re having lunch with a prospective employer, dinner with a client, or just a casual meal with friends, try to relax, smile, and enjoy the company and food. Even if you make a dining faux pas, such as taking someone else’s bread, keep calm, apologize to your neighbor, and offer them yours. Most people will understand and help smooth things over.
For more tips on navigating various social situations, check out my ebook or get in touch for personalized coaching.
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Kristina Szabova is a certified Etiquette Consultant and member of the International Association of Professional Etiquette Consultants.
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